Darkest Things About the Dark Ages

If you ever used the term “The Dark Ages” in school, there’s a good chance it left your history teachers rather annoyed. The concept of a “Dark Age” originated with the Italian scholar Petrarch, and it was the era he believed to be living through. According to Petrarch, the world had seen an incredible expansion of greatness and expression through the Greeks and Romans, but that there had been a large cultural decline since then.

Petrarch’s views of such a bleak era in human history were mainly in regards to literature, but when Caesar Baronius coined the term “Dark Ages” he expanded it to a general decline in society and science as a whole. Modern historians look negatively on this term, viewing it as myopic and factually inaccurate. Instead they refer to this period as the Early Middle Ages, though by some definitions the Dark Ages encompassed the entirety of the Middle Ages.

But even if the name Dark Ages is generally frowned upon now, there are still plenty of truly dark things about life in Europe between 476 and 1450.

No Centralized Government

When the Roman Empire collapsed, centralized government died with it throughout the majority of Europe. This would last for centuries, and most lands were ruled by feudal lords. Feudalism was a hierarchical structure by which lords would own land that peasants worked in exchange for protection and the right to live there.

However, since there wasn’t a centralized government, a lord would have difficulty expanding their lands beyond the immediate area their army could control. This was made even more difficult by the fact that most of these lords didn’t even really have a full time army in the first place; wars would be fought using the peasants that were working the land as conscripted soldiers by warring feudal lords.

That’s already not a great deal for the peasants, but it got much worse than that. One of the ways that a lord would attempt to expand their reach was to break their land up into various fiefdoms. Each of these fiefs was controlled by one of that lord’s vassals who then had the responsibility of protecting it themselves. These vassals would effectively be the lord of that area, but they would answer to their own lord to whom they had sworn an oath.

In the event of a war with a neighbouring lord, the vassals would be expected to provide support for their lord’s other fiefs.

Things really became problematic when some of these vassals decided to enact the practice of subinfeudation. This was when a vassal would break up their fief into smaller subfiefs, acting as lord to their vassals while still answering to their own lord. If this is starting to sound like a really confusing version of a pyramid scheme, it pretty much was. And as always, the people getting screwed were those at the bottom of the pyramid.

Because of the hierarchy of lords and unclear territorial boundaries, peasants could be required to fulfill obligations for multiple different lords. Not only did these include taxes, but they could be conscripted for military service, construction work, or to work a lord’s personal fields as well.

Since there was no centralized government, this also meant there was often no currency. Old Roman coins were sometimes used, but generally only by wealthy businessmen. Some lords would create their own currencies, but peasants usually had to pay their taxes in the form of crops. This was a dangerous situation for them, as a peasant’s life was dedicated to hoping they could grow enough food to feed their family with enough left over to trade for new tools.

The taxes a peasant paid would typically amount to 10% of their crops per lord that claimed a stake to their land, plus an additional 10% tithe to the church. And that was before other taxes such as taxes to use roads and sales tax on any transactions they made should they have excess crops. These lords offered little to nothing in return, since the same peasants that were paying these taxes all had to be a part of the army that was meant to protect their land from invasion.

And these invasions would happen all too often. Vassals would pledge loyalty to their lords, but not to that lord’s other vassals. Once subinfeudation began, the sub-vassals would only pledge loyalty to their immediate lord. This created immense confusion and would result in territories that were supposed to be aligned waging war against one another in addition to wars against neighboring territories.

There was also a lack of a clear line of succession for these feudal lords, which resulted in even more upheaval and fighting amongst supposed allies whenever one died. Life for peasants may not have been particularly amazing during the Roman Empire, but the Dark Ages saw them stripped of all freedoms and exploited to a level far beyond what they had experienced previously.

Peasants were bound to their landowning lords for life, and even needed the lords’ permission for marriage. It’s estimated that between peasants and slaves, the number of people living without any freedom or autonomy may have been as high as 75% at various points throughout the Dark Ages.

Medical “Science”

It’s no surprise that medicine in the Dark Ages would have been more than a bit lacking. Modern medicine is still relatively new, and a lot of the most horrible treatments and superstitions you could imagine go back to the Dark Ages.

There were a lot of questionable techniques that you’re likely already familiar with, such as bloodletting and leeching. While leeches do have some applications in modern medicine, we assure you that was not the case with how they were being used 1,000 years ago.

If you were to get sick back then, you’d likely go visit a physician. These physicians relied on a combination of herbal remedies, talismans, and magic that was largely ineffective. For example, a woman during childbirth would have amulets placed on her stomach to speed up the contractions, and eagle feces would be applied to relieve the pain.

That’s all well and good for your run of the mill ailments, but what happened if you came back from battle and needed surgery? Or what if you needed dental work done? In that case there’d be no reason to waste time with a doctor; people would just visit their barbers instead.

It makes a lot of sense if you think about it. Barbers owned sharp straight razors and the skill to use them, so who better to perform surgery? These barber surgeons were trained at everything from cleaning up a person’s sideburns to amputating limbs, all of which could be done with the same razor.

This lack of real medicine was quite problematic for people of the era, and any disease could prove fatal. But no disease was more scary than the plague. When we mention the plague, your mind almost certainly jumps immediately to the Black Death. This was the most devastating series of outbreaks and it claimed the lives of up to 60% of Europeans, but it wasn’t the only outbreak.

The bubonic plague existed before the Dark Ages and it continues to exist to this day, and the Black Death was not the only major outbreak.

There was also the Justinian Plague from 541-549. It’s unknown exactly how many people died during that plague, but some historians estimate that at its peak the plague was claiming the lives of 5,000 people per day in Constantinople alone. Because medicine and the spread of disease were so poorly understood, this led to some real problems for people at the tail end of the Dark Ages.

Throughout most of this time period, people recognized the importance of bathing. They didn’t know anything about germ theory, but they still understood that making yourself clean was good. Plus the public baths were all coed, so that’s where many sex workers were located; this gave people additional incentive to bathe regularly.

However, following the first outbreak of the Black Death, physicians were looking for any possible cause they could find. One theory they put forth was that bathing was actually bad for you. Too much exposure to water and cleanliness had left people weak and susceptible to disease, and the practice of bathing was strongly discouraged.

A Culinary Nightmare

When the centralized government of the Roman Empire collapsed, so too did the means to look after its infrastructure. One of the most important inventions of the Romans was the aqueducts, but they quickly fell into disrepair. After all, why would a lord waste their own time and resources fixing up the aqueducts just to provide water to some asshole miles away?

Without the aqueducts to provide clean water, all that was left was disgusting water that was contaminated with sewage. Although there was a lack of medical knowledge, and human waste products all too often played a role in medical treatments, people fortunately still seemed to understand that they probably shouldn’t drink the sewage water. But humans need water to live, so how was everybody going to stay hydrated if there wasn’t any palatable water to drink?

The answer of course was booze. For much of the Dark Ages people consumed large amounts of weak ale every day instead of drinking any water, because the fermentation process would kill off many of the harmful bacteria. While it might be tempting to think this would have been one of the best parts of the Dark Ages, it would still be nice to at least have water be an option. Milk and occasionally fruit juices were produced, but these were generally reserved for children who weren’t allowed to drink alcohol.

When it came to food, there wasn’t much along the lines of choice either. Most people’s diets consisted of little more than cereal grains, beans, and nuts. Bread, porridge, and gruel were not only staple foods, but for a lot of people they were the only foods. Meat protein was rarely available to peasants outside of any small game they managed to catch for themselves, such as rabbits or small wild boar, or farm animals like oxen that were no longer healthy enough to use for plowing the fields.

While lamb and mutton were available for the wealthy, the only meat product that peasants would ever have access to was pork. Cows were expensive to feed and raise and were more valuable for their milk production than as meat, making beef extremely expensive. But pigs would eat any old crap and required little effort to maintain. Despite being more affordable than other meats, pork was still not abundant.

Though the numbers varied throughout the duration of the Dark Ages and throughout different parts of Europe, as much as 75% of the average peasant’s diet could be cereal grains.

Not only is that extremely boring, but it carried with it a very specific danger. Ergotism, also known as Saint Anthony’s Fire, is an infection resulting from eating bread contaminated with ergots. This fungus grew on cereal grains, and epidemics of the disease were common throughout the Dark Ages. Ergotism caused seizures, diarrhea, vomiting, psychosis, and other painful symptoms.

Severe cases would lead to gangrene and eventually death. Because bread was so ubiquitous as one of the few foods peasants could afford, no connection was made between the disease and contaminated grains until the late 1500s.

Torture

Torture is hardly unique to the Dark Ages. It existed long before and continues to exist today. When you think of the Ancient Greeks, the method of torture that most likely comes to mind is the Brazen Bull. Crucifixion is basically synonymous not just with Ancient Roman torture but with Ancient Rome in general. But the Dark Ages were truly the renaissance of new methods for torturing people.

Torture in the Dark Ages was not just used on criminals, political opponents, or to extract information, but it was a major tool of the inquisition as well. Some torture devices were straight forward in their purpose, such as the head crusher, the knee splitter, and the Iron Spider, also known as the breast ripper.

Others were a little more elaborate in their application. The breaking wheel, or Catherine Wheel, was a form of torture and execution utilizing what was essentially an ordinary wagon wheel. The condemned would be restrained, and the large, heavy wheel would be brought down to break the bones in their arms and legs. Once their bones were sufficiently destroyed, they were then woven through the spokes of the wheel which was placed on top of a pillar.

The prisoner would then spend days waiting to die of exposure, dehydration, or attacks from scavenging animals.

There was also the iron chair, which enjoyed several different incarnations. Early versions of this torture involved simply restraining the victim into an iron chair and lighting a fire beneath it to cook them alive. This technique was later modified to take place near a large fire, and the prisoner would be slowly pushed closer and closer to the fire, increasing the heat absorbed by the metal.

The final version of the iron chair was the most sinister, and part of the torture didn’t even involve being seated in the chair. A person who was suspected of a crime or of heresy would first watch somebody else endure the newest version of the iron chair torture. In this incarnation, the chair would have anywhere from 500-1,500 holes in it. Just outside these holes were metal spikes that were operated by a crank, allowing torturers to slowly make the spikes protrude and eventually puncture their victim.

This torture could take hours or even days, as none of the spikes would impale vital organs and there was minimal loss of blood until the spikes were withdrawn. If a person could endure watching somebody else suffer the duration of this torture without breaking and revealing whatever information was demanded of them, then it was their turn to be seated in the chair.

But one of the most brutal forms of torture from the Dark Ages was the Judas Cradle. The cradle featured a wooden or metal stool, but instead of a flat seat the top of the stool attenuated to a sharp point. The accused would be stripped naked and strapped into a harness above the pointed seat.

They would then be forced to use their legs to hold themselves in position above it while being interrogated. How long this torture lasted depended on the physical strength of the individual, but eventually their leg muscles would give out and the sharp stool would begin to pierce through their anus, scrotum, or vagina depending on where the inquisitors had positioned it.

This torture device was developed by the inquisition, and particularly cruel inquisitors could make the torture even harder for the person. They might be forced to hold weights, increasing the load on the leg muscles, or the inquisitors could poke, prod, or move their legs around to make it harder for them to stand. Anybody who didn’t reveal whatever information the inquisitors were after fast enough to be released before they were impaled by the Judas Cradle would suffer certain death from the device.

So while the phrase “Dark Ages” has fallen out of favour and is generally regarded as an unfair and inaccurate description of the era, it’s still safe to say that it wasn’t exactly a great time to be alive.

Key Takeaways

• The term ‘Dark Ages’ originated with Petrarch and Baronius, but modern historians prefer ‘Early Middle Ages’
• Feudal lords ruled Europe without a centralized government, leading to constant warfare and exploitation of peasants.
• Medical practices were primitive, relying on ineffective remedies and superstitions, with barbers often performing surgeries.
• The diet of peasants was monotonous and dangerous, often leading to diseases like ergotism from contaminated grains.
• Torture was widespread and brutal, used by the inquisition and for various punishments, including the Judas Cradle and Iron Chair.

Sources

• Original Side Projects video: Darkest Things About the Dark Ages
• Hero image source by Robert Smirke / openverse, cc0.

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